Kafkaworld's Blog

January 4, 2012

On Inappropriate Highways

Filed under: On the Road,random paranoia,The beach — kafkaworld @ 9:22 am
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There is a sign at the entrance to our local highway, making it clear that dogs and nude bathing are not allowed there.  Odd?  Perhaps I should explain that the highway in question is actually a beach.  That’s right, a beach where small children like to splash about in the shallows, build huge gothic castles and bury their Dads in the sand.  You’d like to think that they could play here safely without being run over by huge 4WDs driven by petrol heads who are physically unable to leave their cars for any reason.   Or have any taste in music.  Or turn the music down so that those of us who came to the beach to listen to seagulls and not AC/DC could have some peace.  Seriously, if you are sitting on the beach, wondering which end of Moreton Island is North, would you rather be approached by a dog or a Toyota Land Cruiser?  Although Land Cruisers don’t really approach, they just run you down, so let’s keep them on the M1 where they belong.

Today is Libertarian Apricot Freedom Day*

*This year, I have a First Dog on the Moon Calendar.  First Dog likes to celebrate esoteric days which are mostly ignored elsewhere in the media.  I will try to keep you informed in case you wish to celebrate some of these obscure occasions.



November 25, 2011

On The First Swim of Summer

Filed under: flora and fauna,life,The beach — kafkaworld @ 10:04 am
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Anyone who believes that late November is a little tardy for the first dip into the Pacific Ocean should bear this in mind.  After the sea comes back from its winter holidays in the Antarctic, where it whiles away the icy nights by stroking the furry bottoms of seals and walruses,  it’s pretty damn cold I can tell you.  It needs time to warm up to the point where I can still feel my legs after I dive  tiptoe into the gentle waves.  So today was the big day.  Because I haven’t been to the beach for so long, there were several unrelated but joyfully wondrous firsts to savour.

Yellow Tailed Black Cockatoo

Extensive research (see Dr Google)  revealed that there are six varieties of black cockatoo in Australia, and the yellow-tailed is the largest.  Flocks comprising about half a dozen birds visit us here in early summer and lay waste to the coastal banksias.  They are the natural enemy of the Big Bad Banksia Men, so kiddies can sleep soundly in their beds during the summer holidays, secure in the knowledge that these glorious birds are looking out for them.  As well as the startling yellow tail feathers, they have a rather endearing yellow ear patch just above the huge beaks which they use to get at the banksia seeds.  Usually they sit up in the trees, but this afternoon I came upon two of them on the ground having a picnic among the fallen cones.

The First Abandoned/Lost FlipFlop of Summer

 By the end of March, there are boxes of these, in all sizes, shapes and colours, floating around the Woorim community.  Perhaps they are not abandoned, but just cannot stand the thought of co-existing with their mate during a long hot summer and have run away to sea.  Who knows.  Either way, we could make a fortune on ebay if there was a market for single thongs.  Unfortunately, no such market exists …. yet.

The Arrival of the Migratory Sandbags

Nobody (except the Moreton Bay Shire Council and they won’t tell) knows where these mysterious sandbags spend the winter months.  I suspect Hawaii or Tahiti or Bali, judging by the drunken swaggering involved as they traipse back over the dunes to Woorim Beach.  I have never seen a sober sandbag and neither have any of my neighbours.  Anyway, they arrive here every November, clutter up the beach and disturb the peace with their drunken orgies, and then, thank heavens, depart in early autumn.  And I (and this really gets up my nose) pay my exorbitant rates to fund their endless partying!!  It’s an absolute disgrace.

Anyway, apart from all that, I had a lovely swim and another first for this summer – sunburn.  Anyone who’s thinking of visiting, now is a great time to do it.  We can all go and throw rotting fruit at the sandbags.  What fun!

August 7, 2010


Filed under: The beach — kafkaworld @ 5:37 am

Winter morning

I never tire of the view from our verandah.  This is what you see if you look to the right.  The road is hardly inspiring, but if you skip across that and then wander off between those two trees in the distance, you’ll find a path which leads to the World’s Gentlest Surf Beach.  On a midwinter day, the sea will be sparklingly limpid, and you can stare at  Moreton Island as it  floats away in the distance.

Be cautious about venturing down for a romantic dawn stroll.  Sunrise  is peak hour  at Woorim Beach as hundreds of terrifyingly fit elderly persons power walk through the dunes.  Don’t get in their way and don’t try to keep up with them.  They will trample you into the sand and never bother looking back.

Oh, and welcome to Bribie Island!

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